Sunday

So, I don't want to turn this into a rotator cuff blog, but it's what pervades my thoughts right now. It's weird. I have an arm full of cortisone so it doesn't hurt. So, perversely, I wonder if my arm is now healed. I know the cortisone is supposed to stop it hurting, but still I wonder.



With my nephew having been gone for nearly 3 weeks, I find that his wife is finally grieving. I'm angry with her simply for putting Robert through the pain in their relationship. I know that Robert was no angel, however, he didn't move in with someone else like his wife did. I have yet to grieve for Robert. Instead I grieve for his daughter without a father and for his father without a son, and especially for his father having had to see what a father should never see. At least he didn't take Butch with him.

Book Review - Sabriel

Sabriel, by Garth Nix - I recently finished this book, and have been reading the entire series. To me, this appeared to have been a typical fantasy novel about returning a king to his throne with the added delights of an undead leader and his minions. The undead are the salvation of this novel, giving it a more original swing than had they not been present. I do not anticipate rereading this book, but I enjoyed it immensely.

I try to read the books that Pat reads so we can talk about them together. This goes both ways however, as he reads what I reads, but he doesn't always enjoy that reading material.

Rotator Cuff Surgery

Well, since no one reads this I can vent in peace. The orthopod told me I need my rotator cuff repaired. Ugh. I don't know how I feel about this. I'm scared, but I also want this because then my shoulder pain will stop and I can sleep on my right side again. I hope Dr. Jaffin is correct. As I recall, when Pat had this surgery, the doctor just got the MRI to appease the insurance company not for a diagnosis. He diagnosed Pat based on tests done in the office, The same tests I just had done. I go in for an arthrogram soon. I wish the imaging office would just call so I can schedule it.

Mini-Me

When Trouble-Maker came home from school yesterday, Mini-Me wanted to play with him. I told him no, he kept whining. I told him no again. Then he went into his room and decided to pull his chest of drawers down on himself. If I hadn't seen it come down he would be dead right now. As it was, a drawer came out and hit him on the forehead. He had to have 3 stitches and will probably have a big scar. We'll have to see a plastic surgeon is 6 months. I'm scared and I blame myself. I should have told him no and let him down easier. We have to fix that room now.

The Southern Clan

Pat's whole family is coming up to visit this weekend starting today. They're coming to escape the mess the Robert left behind him when he killed himself. It's going to be an awkward time. Nephew hasn't been up here since Pat and I got married. Niece has never been up here. Brother and his wife haven't been up here in a year. They're going to rent a van and drive up together. Trouble-Maker won't be here. He prefers to spend time with his sea scout troop as opposed to seeing his family. Mini-Me can't wait to see them, he has such a strong attachment to Brother even though he's only seen him a handful of times.

Diet Coke

When I was about 10, I suppose. Coke ran an ad campaign with Max Headroom. It was basically a way to lambast Pepsi, which they referred to as "The P-Word". In me, that campaign stuck. To do this day I hate Pepsi, and will not drink it. I will also not drink regular soda, or Coke Zero. I want my Diet Coke, my drink of choice. What I hate most is when I go to a restaurant, ask for Diet Coke, then get Diet Pepsi. I can tell the difference and I have beaten every taste test I've taken on them. What can I say, I love my Diet Coke.

Onions and Mushrooms

Hamburgers are cheap, easy and kid friendly. However, that doesn't mean they can't be adult tasty either. One of my ways to dress them up is by topping Pat's and mine with carmelized onions and mushrooms.



These are easy to make, you just can't rush them. As in making good barbeque, low and slow is the rule. I cut the Then I add a generous amount of olive oil to a pan, heat it up then dump in the mushrooms and onions with some salt to get them sweating. After they start sizzling and dropping some juice I drop the heat to low then just stir them every 5 minutes or so until they get as brown as I like. I make a bunch at a time to keep on hand for stews, soups, omelettes, and the like.

New Computer

We bought a new computer. Pat came home from Lake Elsinore and we went out to dinner and bought a new computer. We ate at Chilis. The food sucked. It was a hard call on the computer. Pat wanted Windows XP for his backgammon game, so we could either buy an old computer or build one. Building would cost a lot of money so we bought one with XP on it. Pat is happy, he still has his XP games. The kids are happy, their games load again. They are happy, I am happy.

Pat is Coming Home

Pat called and said he is coming back today. Today is also Robert's funeral. I want him back and I'm glad he's coming back but I'm confused because I also want him to be there for Butch. I can't wait to see him.

Mother's Day

Today is Mother's Day. Trouble-Maker was with his friends. He called and told me that he was going to do stuff for Mother's day with Lisa and Nate's mom because they deserve a special Mother's day. Then he told me "It's not like it's a special day for you Mom". He loves to hurt me. That was really mean.

Pat is still down is SoCal with no end in site. I don't want to call them because I don't want to talk to them. Pat doesn't answer the cell phone. I need him and I hate him for not being here but he's needed down there.

Robert

My nephew killed himself last night. I had to call Pat at work and tell him. Trouble-Maker still went to to Sea Scouts. He doesn't care about his family. His friends always come first. Pat is driving down now to be with them for who knows how long. I am mad at Robert for what he did to Butch. I will miss Pat. We've not been separated like this in the course of our marriage. I feel selfish for wanting him when I know Butch needs him.

Book Review - Reagan and Thatcher

I'm a conservative, which is a daring statement to make nowadays. I have been since I my father explained Democrats and Republicans to me during the 1984 presidential race. No he did not influence me. My brother, who got the talk at the same time, is more liberal than Kruschev.

While Reagan is not my pick for number one president of all time (ask and you'll be shocked) He is in my top 5. So I wanted to read this book and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Reagan and Thatcher, A Political Marriage was a survey of their relationship during their respective times in power as well as providing a background of their lives before they came to power. The information is taken from speeches, documents, events of the time, and phone conversation records between the two leaders. While their relationship was mainly political, they shared a close personal bond as well that was broken only by Reagan's diagnosis with Alzheimer's disease. This book engaged me, but I don't think I'd buy a copy for my personal library.

Kipper the Dog

This kids show has entranced my youngest son Bun. It is the story of Kipper, a brown dog, and his various friends. His best friend is Tiger, a grey dog, and he also has, for friends, Jake, Pig and Arnold. Mouse lives with Pig, and he had pet gerbil named Roly Poly in one episode.

Kipper is an unusual show for kids. It's very quiet and nothing too bad ever happens. Pat has a problem with one episode, when Mouse joins the cast, and Mouse is seen washing her bottom with Kipper's toothbrush. Later on Kipper brushes his teeth with the brush. Pat always watches it, the squirms and complains about the affair. EVERY SINGLE TIME.

I enjoy reading the books to the kids because the illustrations are simple and to the point. The pictures focus on Kipper and whatever he is interacting with at the moment. No backgrounds and no borders. My kids follow along with the story better this way because there's nothing to confuse them with.

4 Years Ago

Pat had rotator cuff surgery on May 5 2005. That was a very hard day for him. Not only did he have surgery, obviously, he almost died. He given muscle relaxants during the course of surgery. His surgery took longer than expected so naturally he was given more of the relaxants. He woke up and they sent him home within 1/2 hour. His surgery was at the end of the day at the surgicenter and the nurses and attendants were anxious to go home. His doctor called in the evening to check on Pat, and to have him start doing some exercises to prevent scar tissue from building up. We raised his hand over his head, and his heart rate plummeted. He started going into shock and I raced him to the emergency room. In the truck he fell into my lap. I had to get the emergency room people to get a gurney to get him into the room. His heart rate was 30 BPM. Yes, thats what it was. They gave him medicine to counteract the muscle relaxant, to raise his heart rate and to get him out of shock. A few hours later we brought him home.

Shoemaker's Children

"A shoemaker's children go barefoot", the old proverb goes, "and doctor's wives die young." I would like to ammend this. LAN administrators wives go computerless. Our computer has been on the fritz for well over a year. It started when Norton did an update on our anti-virus program. We were running a firewall and the new Norton was incompatible with the firewall program. To fix the program Pat had to uninstall the firewall, uninstall the anti-virus, go through the registry to manually remove all instances of the Norton program, then reinstall the anti-virus. Understandably, he didn't want to have ANYTHING to do with fixing the computer after this and it's now suffering from a terminal illness. The blue screen of death comes up hourly, and most of the children's games wont load because it says they aren't compatible with windows, even though they were a year ago. I would like to kill the computer, to take the 22 rifle and put a slug though its mother board. Perhaps then Pat would get a new one.

Garbanzo Beans

So while I am not a vegan, or even a vegetarian, I like to add these options to our menu. I don't like to snack on chips or cookies that much, with the exception of Cheetos Hot Chips. What fills the need for snack food for me, at the moment, are these garbanzo beans whose recipe I got from Vive Le Vegan. I always keep a bowl of these in the refrigerator. I make them 3 cans at a time and they last two to three days. I add a teaspoon of pepper to the mix to spice them up a bit.